IDEAFACTORY

i am so tired of having to solve captchas to do everything on myspace. i would use facebook, but its not as fun to make your profile JUST HOW YOU WANT IT. i think what im getting at here, is someone should create something exactly like myspace, earn a fuckload of money, and give me some.

in closing, i understand there is a new ghostbusters game coming out, with all original voices? excuse me yes please pretty please with sugar on top. what kind of shit is that, anyways? “pretty please with sugar on top?” some pre industrial revolution little lord fauntleroy mommy dearest bullshit? isn’t it about time we started to clean our beautiful earth of some outdated and useless expressions. just the bad ones. or the stupid ones we never question. why shouldnt we? just get these words and phrases together, and toss them. toss them into a rocket ship along with a few people we can ALL stand to be around, and maybe some paintings given to me by ex girlfriends that i still have, and just fucking blast them into a white dwarf or something.
you know?

phrases to eliminate:

“OK.
seriously, no one even really know what this means. its thought to have originated from an acronym for a phrase that was popular for maybe less than ten years when it was HILARIOUS to spell words wrong. Oll klear? oll korrekt? ex-fucking-cuse me? i recently checked out a website that had something like 25 different stories on where exactly this came from. who cares! get it OUT of here.

fuck – i use this word way too much and im pretty sure its played out at this point. also includes fucking, fuckity, the use of fuck as a prefrace such as – fuckhead. fucktard, fuckwit, ex-fucking-cuse me. and all other forms. this also includes cute little ALMOST bad words, including frick, shick, poo, doo, and a host of other insane words ive thankfully blocked from my mind.

beaner– wtf? there are PLENTY of other things you can say if you really want to offend someone from mexico. but beans? beans are a a delicious legume. thats like calling someone from america “burgerer” because americans eat lots of hamburgers. hotdogger. get outtttaaa here.

faggot – ive never liked this word, not because it is used as a derogatory term or anything like that, it just has a weird ring to it that i never enjoy, be it a bundle of sticks, a hateful term for a gay person, or an endearing term from one gay person to another. all uses are upsetting. get it out of here. also get nigger out of here as well. it has that same kind of painful pang to it. hearing nigga isnt bad really, because its used in so many amazing rap and hip hop songs that i love. but i hate not being able to comfortably use a word from something that i enjoy. just because of my skin color. pretty much all racist terms can go on this list really, because racism is pppppppprobably the stupidest thing that exists today. with the popiel pocket fisherman in a close 2nd, The Showtime Six Star Plus 25 Knife Set and the Solid Flavor Injector finishing 3rd.
seriously though what do you need a fishing pole in your pocket for?

okely dokely – whatever else from ned flanders said. doodley, whatever. dont like it. most of the people who would use this probably never even really watched the simpsons, and just picked this up somewhere. its still okay to reference the simpsons though. its written like the bible or something. a few of the seasons never stop being funny no matter HOW many idiots you hear quote it. amen.

stewie – speaking of cartoons, im not sure if this term existed before family guy, and dont care eitherway.

duh – this one seems to be fading out on its own, as i haven’t heard it in at least 8 years, i may have been the first one to have said it in 2008.

hella/hecka – i realize this is a “norcal” or “cali” thing, but i intend on sending this word to space.

thats hot – i know that we hear a lot about celebrity culture, and how celebrities get too much press for being worthless in general. i agree with this, but i had to mention that paris hilton still uses this phrase. i think she even has a patent on the phrase or something. obviously was the first one to string those 2 words together. either way, i make it a point to keep the lives of “young hot hollywood” as far away from my consciousness as possible, but they still end up in my face. this is why we need to take all those black water guys, and put them to work for the good of our country, instead of the shame of it. just let those guys roll dirty in their black SUV’s through downtown LA, and just let them massacre whoever is inside of whatever stupid club with whatever stupid name like “milk” or “spoon” or “red” or whatever other stupid shit people have named their worst little whorehouse in LA.

thats just how i roll – okay i admit i find myself using this as a standby from time to time. thats why we need to get RID of it. its like having a gun for protection, only the thing is youre more likely to use it on a loved one.

for shizzle- dizzle- nizzle- all the izzles.
– not that anyone really says this stuff anymore, but every now and then you hear some poor asshole who didnt get the memo use this, and it just sends shivers down your spine. ruins your day.

lol/ all emoticons – this one i think is mostly extinct as well, save for the 24,000 or so mongoloids who are spawning under kitchen sinks and going straight to some autonomously myspace account with only friends they dont know, whose comments are 98% blingees.

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2 thoughts on “IDEAFACTORY

  1. this is the funniest thing ive read in a while. but one thing, i say ALL of these things on a daily basis, please dont send them to space.

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